sooooo he wrote this one and told me it was about me. its labeled my muse



My Muse

You were there again today. You’re always there when i need you the most. Picking up the shattered glass that is me and putting me back together.

Weekends hit me like a truck, plowing my body so deep into the ground that my screams go unheard. Darkness closes in around me and my breath stops coming altogether. I’m lost in this abyss, six feet underground, and I close my eyes for the last time.

Then all at once, my breath comes back, my body loosens, and light hits my eyelids so hard that it hurts. I open my eyes and see you at the top of this grave i’ve dug, leaning on your shovel with a smile that defies reality. You try to hide your wings, but you can’t. I grab your hand and you lift me back up to where I belong.

I turn around and your gone; the angel in shorts and stars in her eyes. A single white feather is left in your stead. It dances around me, begging me to play with it. I take it home with me; a little piece of you that I selfishly call my own.


You’re with me now. As I write this, your feather is my quill. Your wings keep me warm and your smile opens the curtains in my mind. I can see the world clearly now as I have never seen it before. Thank you for granting me this gift that no one else could give me.


My angel in shorts.



My Muse.


there's other ones that allude to me, stuff he's talked about with me before but he won't actually say its me. OH! and a picture...he looks way more like mexican in this picture than in real life. but whateve.



let me know what you think and junk.


i write the best blogs to you guys drunk :P

goodnight!

its almost 3 in the morning

as i'm sure you could guess, i'm drunk

wanna know a secret?

i like nate a lot.

and THAT scares the shit out of me.

letting myself feel for the first time in a long time

is terrifying

especially since i'm not sure he's worth it...

he wrote a really cute blog about me

want me to post it so you can read it?

aaaand maybe a picture of him so you can get an idea?

weird thing is, i think this one's a keeper

we're so abusive to each other

but at the same time no one gets us like we do.

thats SO high school and so lame

but so true.

when did i become such a sap?

<3

so i've basically decided that i have colon cancer

because uh

my bowel movements?

they're not working

and when they do...

they're bloody.

like BLOODY

and i know thats gross.

but i want you to know how scared i am.

i'm also home!

and i also just had sex with nate!

which mmmm

was fantastic

and it'll happen again this weekend

i'm here till sunday.

yay!

<3

in case you were wondering...

when sudaffed says

DO NOT TAKE WITH ANOTHER PRODUCT CONTAINING ANY OF THE SAME ACTIVE INGREDIENTS

it means it.

even if it is just phenylephrine.

whatever that is.

that it has in common with robitussin.

cuz um. you won't feel good afterwards

worse in fact, than you did before

oh, and taking advil?

doesn't help things

so since i haven't made a mess enough of my body already

imma take some sleeping meds

so i can sleep through my strep throat

and my inner ear fluids jiggling around.

ugh.

<3

just put it on myspace but maybe you'll see it here first

Poetic Imperfections.

Your fingers dance across
the scar down my arm,
as quiet as the flutter
of bird wings and my affection.

Your lips brush against destruction
criss crossed on my legs.
Long healed, long forgotten
in the absence of my bareness.

You kiss harder, as if to repair.
Then to my lips, something sustaining.
Pull me close, grasp onto me tight.
I'm afraid sometimes of melting into the night.

Holding my hand, guide me through.
The simplest gesture combined
with the strongest one of them all.
The irony has me distracted in amusement.

It was different than usual..
More fervent. More intimate. More sincere.
I'll pretend I need something as to retreat.
So I can scoop up my armor strewn across the floor,
Stripped there with my clothes only moments before.